Friend to Flirt
Tips to help you transition from "great
friend" status to "Mr./Mrs. Maybe"
... from the DATING
~Everyone's been there before. They've had
their hearts set on "the one" for years. Problem is "the one"
is a really good friend. Such a good friend in fact, that when
external sources pry for information they always reply "But
he/she is such a good friend. It'd be like dating my brother/sister".
Sounds familiar, right?
But that doesn't have to be the case. Chances are the reason
you two are such "good friends" is because you are extremely compatible.
What's more, and kudos to you here, the other person is probably
too afraid to let their guard down, or afraid to lose a valuable
friendship. Thus, it is much easier for them to shrug off any
potential romance between you two than deal with the future repercussions
of a relationship gone sour. This tends to be the case particularly
with most women.
Nowadays women find it increasingly more difficult to develop
and maintain a healthy friendship with a member of the opposite
sex. Trouble is, they can never seem to grasp the reality that
a man will always be interested in being more than just "friends"
with a girl after a certain point. More than likely there was
an initial attraction to begin with: the male had simply settled
for a friendship with the hopes that something more would eventually
develop. It's time for men and women around the world to wake
Naturally there will be that "one special person" who refuses
to see the trees from the forest. Here's a few flirting tips that
will help you help them see you in a not so "brotherly/sisterly"
light any longer...
1) OH DREAMY EYES
Just as eye contact is a great flirting move for the total stranger,
it is equally powerful on the "best friend". The trick is to hold
the eye contact for longer than you normally would at opportune
moments. Moreover you should keep your look soft and affectionate
to bring a moment of intimacy between you two. This can be tricky
if the friend starts to think your behavior is a bit left of the
normal, but it's a necessary means to test the chemistry of a
possible relationship. Remain persistent and pair it with some
of the following tips. The regularity in affectionate gazes will
eventually ring a bell in your beloved's head.
2) MY DECISIVE ONE
Women love a man who knows what he wants. If truly comfortable
with themselves, men will feel the same way about women. Not only
does it show confidence, it alleviates the fear of a "needy" partner
who is in constant need of reassurance or babysitting. That said,
when trying to snag the attention of your prospect remember to
always show assertiveness and decisiveness in both your decisions
and actions. You're confident on-top-of-the-ball attitude will
likely render a positive reaction. Just remember to avoid being
overly pushy. Simply act as if you know what you want, and go
for it. They'll get the hint soon enough.
3) WHY, THANK YOU
When trying to score brownie points think compliments, compliments,
compliments. But remember there is a big difference between the
"friendly compliment" and the "intimate compliment." Friendly
compliments always maintain a distance, they respect the privacy
of the individual thereby offering generically safe compliments
like "That's a nice purse." Although it shows you're observant
nature, it is safe and impersonal. It's more or less a compliment
she will likely receive from her other friends as well; not exactly
what we're going for here.
Conversely, an intimate compliment will take the risk of getting
personal. The compliment will focus on distinguishing the person
from the rest of their sex in a valuable way such as, "You have
really beautiful eyes," or "has anyone ever told you what a nice
smile you have?" Although these can appear cheesy and run the
risk of seeming like pick up lines you must analyze the context.
The person you are trying to impress is not a stranger in a bar,
they're your friend. In a way, you've already made it through
the pick-up line round and have started a relationship, its just
not the type you wanted. Giving an intimate compliment is an easy
way to call attention to the fact that, "yes we're friends,
but I would like more."
4) WAS THAT A WINK?
Winks are a great way to give subtle, intimate recognition to
a person. Nothing says comfort like a wink across the room. If
the two of you have been separated and are engaging in conversation
with two separate parties, maintain attention by giving a wink
to let him/her know that you're still there.
If someone say's
something that's not all together funny, laugh anyways to ease
the awkwardness. Also, shoot a wink over in the direction of that
special someone" to let them know you're compassionate and receptive
to people's feelings.
Moreover, a wink is private. If you
make a habit of catching a person's attention via the subtle move,
you have established the feeling of separation from the rest:
the two of you have shared a little moment and no one else has
noticed. It becomes a "private joke" between the two of you. That
sense of uniqueness is perfect ammo to catapult the friendship
into relationship status in no time.
5) UP CLOSE & PERSONAL
Nothing is more intimate than body contact. A simple sweep of
your hand over theirs at an opportune moment, a steady protective
hand on the shoulder, a soft hug for perhaps, a bit longer than
was necessary, these are all ways to physically say, "I'm interested."
If you're a guy, try placing your hand on the small of her back
in crowded places, iIt gives a woman a feeling of security and
protection. If the two of you are such "good friends" she should
be flattered, and will take notice that you are looking out for
her. Girls, try lightly grabbing your man's bicep in an opportune
situation, such as when one tells a funny joke. You can laugh
"into" him by leaning forward and lightly grabbing his bicep to
balance. It's always an ego boost when a man is touched in places
of masculinity. Moreover, the effort to initiate contact will
be taken into account by your "friend."
Lastly, the most intimate of all space invaders is the whisper.
Much like the wink it is based on privacy. A whisper closes two
people off from the rest of the world. You don't have to get right
up in one's ear to do so either, you can start by simply lowering
your voice thereby forcing your prospect to lean in closer so
that they can hear what you've said. You can start to share important information or personal achievements with
your "friend" via the personal whisper: make it appear as if you
only care what they think about what you have to tell them. Gradually
as the friend becomes more receptive you can begin to move closer
and become more intimate with your whispers. The more receptive
they are, the likelier it is that you can move ahead and take
the next step.
~Though there's no fool proof method to snag you're heart's desire,
there's also no way to know if things would have ever worked between
you two unless someone takes a chance. Seeing as how they're oblivious
to your affections, the ball's in your court. We can't promise
the love of your life will fall head over heels in love with you
after trying a few of these suave moves. But at this point, do
you really have anything to lose? So take a deep breath, relax,
and when you're ready, go get 'em tiger!